Extract from The Scientifick Lesson:

The story so far...

Jenny Go-Sprightly, a young girl visiting London has been tricked by the keeper of a brothel into becoming another notch on Bartholomew Rakehell's bedpost:

The Stroke of Eight chimed with a knock at the door
“She’ll enter a maid but she’ll leave as a whore”
Cackled Mrs Come-Quickly the raddled old b—h
Thinking of how, in an hour, she’d be rich.

In came poor Jen and was shown to a room
Little suspecting she went to her Doom.
The Villain was waiting The Trap had been set,
Just like a linnet caught in a net,
Was how she’d been snared that day i’ th’ park
And now far from home she stood i’ th’ dark.

Lighting a candle to find out the bed
What did she see, but the Mad grinning head
Of Bartholomew Rakehell. “Sweetheart” he cried
“Tonight is our Wedding-Night. You are my Bride!
So Off with your stays and Out with your bubbies
And On with the game of Wifeys and Hubbies!”

He grabb’d her and held her tight: harder and tighter
But lo and behold, little Jen was a Fighter!
Bred down in BRISTOL her father’d won Prizes
The Art of the Pugilist held no surprises.

She twist’d and turn’d him and landed a jab
He shriek’d like a Molly, he cried like a bab.
With Scientifick Precision she rain’d down her blows,
The Rake tried to counter - she Bloodyed his nose!
Thirty-Two rounds worth of combat in one
Such were the flurry of hits that she won.
Feignin’ and feintin’ with flicks of her wrists
She taught him a lesson with Knuckles and Fists.

Finally beaten, batter’d and bruis’d
His wits were all muddled his senses confus’d.
So forgettin’ the rules and defyin’ the odds
She gave him a Plum one - right in the Cods!